Kylie R
22. Oktober 2022
Beware... this is one of those places that looks great in the photos & somehow gets good reviews (also see: easily pleased British tourists with low expectations) - but couldn't be further from the image portrayed. I'll start with the good points first because honestly, there are so few to mention: the hotel employees (reception we mostly dealt with) were pleasant and helpful, the adjoining cafe does a pretty decent and reasonably priced breakfast, coffee is good, staff also friendly/helpful. The shower was pretty good - strong water flow and nice hot water. Now for the bad points (and oh, where to begin???) First off, our room, despite almost rendering us comatose from the smell of bleach when we first entered, felt grimy and unclean; it was the type of place you didn't want to walk around barefoot. There were hairs everywhere including, unbelievably, stuck to the ceiling of the bathroom (how???) Trying not to look up was a feat in of itself. Our balcony with a view was of the main street and a vacant lot (grass and dirt mostly). We would have kept our balcony door open to admire the urban view except for the fairly constant stench of cigarette smoke wafting into our apartment from the balconies either side of us and/or below. Never mind the fact that we could hear virtually every intimate detail of every conversation on said adjacent balconies (added bonus if they were late-night/early-morning boozers) If we were extra lucky, we could hear them through the bedroom and bathroom walls as well. In case we were feeling noise-deprived there was always the bars located directly (within metres) behind the hotel that stayed open until the early hours (2-3am during the week). Pro Tip: bring your best set of ear plugs and/or heavy duty tranquillisers. The pool area was frankly depressing. I've seen bigger backyard pools and I'm still trying to understand what the attraction is for anyone to spend their entire day on a plastic sunbed lying around a concrete pit of water when there's a reasonably nice beach a few minute's walk away. Cala Llonga itself is ok...nothing special - a few small restaurants, cafes. bars etc. We spent all day every day out, for as long as we could, exploring Ibiza in our rental car so as to spend as little time in our room as possible. The kitchenette was basic but functional, however unlike most places with similar faciliaties, Typic Oasis Sa Tanca doesn't consider the supply of a couple of very basic (cheap) fundamentals such as a few sachets of dishwashing liquid and a dishcloth or sponge, necessary. If you want to use the room safe (a necessity imho), you have to pay for it!!! All in all, one of the worst 6 nights we've spent anywhere in terms of the actual accommodation. Definitely one to forget.
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